
Do you know about spoon theory? If not, go and read it :) Basically, the idea being that each of us have a number of spoons that we can trade for daily tasks, like getting up, eating and so on. Those of us with chronic illnesses have less spoons. We may therefore have to decide between getting up and eating, as we don't have enough spoons. Many of us are well aware of our average number of spoons and now can make a convincing attempt at having a busy, 'normal' life, we are just good at managing our spoons.
This week, I have run out of spoons.
It's tiring being ill all the time, and frustrating. I bumped into a client at the hospital who remarked that I was having 'yet another operation'. People often tell me I don't look well, or comment that I am having 'another' day off ill/injured. I don't mind that, and I certainly don't want any credit for managing to get on with things (what's the alternative?!). But I have noticed this week that friends are not asking me to go out. I know why, it's because I am flaky - I often say no (knowing I have not enough spoons), or worse cancel (unexpectedly lacking spoons). I understand. But it can be quite isolating. If you have friends that are often cancelling on you, are often ill, please keep on asking us to do stuff with you. We can try and juggle our spoons for you, and we will appreciate it.